Is it cruel to keep my dog in a single-dog household?

Discussion dedicated to promoting the well-being of your dog through diet, exercise and general health tips.

Moderators: emmabeth, BoardHost

Post Reply
elephantastic
Posts: 15
Joined: Mon Sep 08, 2014 5:46 pm

Is it cruel to keep my dog in a single-dog household?

Post by elephantastic »

I posted on the dog training forum about the 3-year old boxer mix that my boyfriend and I brought home. After a week of fitting in really well, he suddenly started crying inconsolably and appearing incredibly anxious anytime he was indoors, whether we were with him or not. After trying more walks, longer walks, a ComfortZone plug in, a calming collar, a trip to the vet to make sure he wasn't in pain, treats whenever we entered the house, new treats, more training, less training, play time, etc., we talked to his foster mom. She suddenly remembered that when Buster was first rescued, he was doing poorly health-wise until another dog was brought into his kennel at the vets. After leaving the vets, he was placed in a foster with a second dog and has not lived alone since.

We think we have found the problem to his crying--he is in a single dog household. We only have a cat and no yard, and since he is still iffy with some other dogs we have not really taken him to the dog park much. We are not in a place to adopt another dog right now.

We have been told to keep trying, maybe see if he can make friends with the cat, arrange playdates with other dogs, wait it out, do group training. However, as it stands, he is completely inconsolable while at home and has been like this for the last 2 weeks. Sometimes he has good days with only a few hours of crying and sometimes he has really bad days, crying until 2 in the morning. He's bonded to us somewhat (he's so excited when we come home and loves his walks), and I feel that it would be cruel to put him in another foster home (his previous one is already fostering a new dog) and then try to get adopted out again.

However, it also feels cruel to let him be this anxious constantly. To top it off, we are both stressed at the fact that we can't do anything to help him, except for the one thing we don't have the resources for. We don't want to give him up--we love the little bug! And it breaks out hearts to even consider having to give him up. But we don't know if it would be crueler to keep him and keep trying to work with him, or allow him a chance to be adopted out to a home with another dog.

Does anyone have any experience with something like this?
Ari_RR
Posts: 2037
Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 10:07 am
Location: USA
Contact:

Re: Is it cruel to keep my dog in a single-dog household?

Post by Ari_RR »

My 2 cents - dogs are very adaptable creatures. IF being used to having another dog is indeed the cause of anxiety - I would expect this to resolve itself in time. You just need to be patient, keep loving him, keep training him, don't get stressed, and he will adapt and things will fall in place. Paly dates are probably a good idea to try too - with the dogs that he gets along with. I would stay out of dog parks and random dogs there....
rnor1120
Posts: 282
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 9:35 pm
Location: USA

Re: Is it cruel to keep my dog in a single-dog household?

Post by rnor1120 »

I have a dog-aggressive dog who, weirdly enough, thrives when he's around his closest friends (dog friends, that is). Find a dog or two that he really does well with and make it a point to have weekly play dates (or in my case just adopt his best friend :oops:...). Dog parks are AWFUL for interactions with other dogs if you have a dog that can be iffy - it just takes one sour look for a blow up to occur.

As Ari_RR said, dogs are adaptable. You've not had him for a long period of time. With a solid and consistent routine, he will adapt and thrive, but there needs to be effort on your part. My anxious rescue thrived with tons of exercise and frequent, consistent obedience training.
elephantastic
Posts: 15
Joined: Mon Sep 08, 2014 5:46 pm

Re: Is it cruel to keep my dog in a single-dog household?

Post by elephantastic »

Ari_RR wrote:Paly dates are probably a good idea to try too - with the dogs that he gets along with. I would stay out of dog parks and random dogs there....
arnor1129 wrote:Dog parks are AWFUL for interactions with other dogs if you have a dog that can be iffy - it just takes one sour look for a blow up to occur.

As Ari_RR said, dogs are adaptable. You've not had him for a long period of time. With a solid and consistent routine, he will adapt and thrive, but there needs to be effort on your part. My anxious rescue thrived with tons of exercise and frequent, consistent obedience training.
Thank you. We do know a lot of people with dogs, luckily. We have taken him to the dog park twice and each time he's not interested in the other dogs apart from a casual sniff and he's had a few negative interactions with certain dogs that get too close.

I am up against my boyfriend, who believes that dogs sometimes need companionship. I am not ready to give up on Buster yet, and I'm trying to arrange a meeting with my friend's new puppy. We so want him to be happy with us, but my boyfriend thinks it might be best if he lives in a house with another dog, as much as he wants to keep him. I will keep working on both of them!
User avatar
Nettle
Posts: 10753
Joined: Sun Apr 13, 2008 1:40 pm

Re: Is it cruel to keep my dog in a single-dog household?

Post by Nettle »

It's my experience that dogs like to meet certain other dogs outside, but they don't care for most dogs they meet (the way we don't care for most people we meet) so once they are adult, they are content to sniff and move on.

Another dog in the household, however, may be hugely stressful because it is competition for resources.

We should never forget our dogs are animals. Animals see other animals of their own kind as rivals not potential friends. We humans can get very hung up on every dog liking every other dog, needing other dogs around, needing to 'play' (:roll: see my pinned thread) with other dogs - but what dogs have evolved to do is live with people.

Most of us here, me included, have several dogs. But we got those dogs for ourselves, not as a kind of social club for our initial dog. Groups of dogs in the home need managment: sometimes just a little, sometimes one helluva lot. It's all too easy to think subconsciously that another dog will solve our dog issues effortlessly - but we are the ones who have to solve them. Another dog just adds to them.

OP you have hardly had your dog five minutes :wink: in terms of de-stressing an incredibly traumatised animal. Trust me, it's hard enough to introduce second (or more) dogs to a normal dog. If you want another dog, wait until you have sorted the issues around this dog - which may take a long time - and always be aware that you will get that dog for yourselves not for your dog.
A dog is never bad or naughty - it is simply being a dog

SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
elephantastic
Posts: 15
Joined: Mon Sep 08, 2014 5:46 pm

Re: Is it cruel to keep my dog in a single-dog household?

Post by elephantastic »

Nettle wrote:It's my experience that dogs like to meet certain other dogs outside, but they don't care for most dogs they meet (the way we don't care for most people we meet) so once they are adult, they are content to sniff and move on.

Another dog in the household, however, may be hugely stressful because it is competition for resources.

We should never forget our dogs are animals. Animals see other animals of their own kind as rivals not potential friends. We humans can get very hung up on every dog liking every other dog, needing other dogs around, needing to 'play' (:roll: see my pinned thread) with other dogs - but what dogs have evolved to do is live with people....

OP you have hardly had your dog five minutes :wink: in terms of de-stressing an incredibly traumatised animal. Trust me, it's hard enough to introduce second (or more) dogs to a normal dog. If you want another dog, wait until you have sorted the issues around this dog - which may take a long time - and always be aware that you will get that dog for yourselves not for your dog.
Buster hasn't shown much interest in other dogs anyway, and we don't have space enough for a second dog right now. I've read how introducing a second dog anyway is tough. And I guess we're still not giving it enough time.

I have been looking up articles on the myths of "My dog needs a friend!" for my boyfriend, as he believes keeping our dog alone might be cruel and unhealthy, but I'm finding either a lot on pack mentality or articles arguing for canine companions. Is there anything out there that disproves the idea that dog needs canine friends?
emmabeth
Posts: 8894
Joined: Tue Oct 17, 2006 9:24 pm
Location: West Midlands
Contact:

Re: Is it cruel to keep my dog in a single-dog household?

Post by emmabeth »

Promise you when I get a minute I will dig out my notes from I think a John Rogerson seminar where he mentioned a study that would appear to prove that dogs don't need to interact, let alone live, with other dogs, for their mental well being.
West Midlands based 1-2-1 Training & Behaviour Canine Consultant
Post Reply