Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

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shellfinger
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Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

Post by shellfinger » Fri May 27, 2011 8:12 am

I have a 8 month old Border Collie. She is a wonderful dog other then this peeing all the time. She started a few month ago. She all of a sudden started acting like she is an abused dog (which she never has been). She will not do any of the tricks that she use to love to do. She will not come to you when you call her she hunches in a corner or goes under the table and lays there and pees. If you pet her, talk to her, look at her, command her actually anything makes her pees. She will not even come to you if you have food and you call her. We just removed our carpet because she ruined it. She is house broken she just has this other problem. It is so frustrating. We have tried everything - he stopped talking to her, bending down to pet her, not making eye contact, we tried shaking or throwing a ball before approaching her - nothing is working.

If anyone has any suggestions or has had this happen and has any pointers could you please share. I am at my wits end and I'm ready to give her away because she is ruining everything in our house. She is the best dog in the world other then his major problem.

Thanks,
Michelle

ladybug1802
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Re: Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

Post by ladybug1802 » Fri May 27, 2011 1:53 pm

Others will be along soon to help you, but I wondr if this is a fear period she is in? I cant help any more than that though I'm afraid.

However, I do think its very sad you would give her away because of a hurdle. Would you do that with your child? I dont mean it harshly and obviously you do want to help her otherwise you wouldnt have come on here :D so stick around as you will get some great advice!

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Nettle
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Re: Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

Post by Nettle » Sat May 28, 2011 1:55 am

Sounds to me as if she has had a major trauma and yes she is in a fear period (check out our pinned thread on developmental stages). You have to do some detective work on what has happened to upset her so very badly.

She should also have a vet check to make sure she does not have a urinary infection.

How old was she when this started? What was going on in your/her life at this time?
A dog is never bad or naughty - it is simply being a dog

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emcn916
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Re: Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

Post by emcn916 » Mon May 30, 2011 9:05 pm

Have your dog checked by a vet for a urinary tract infection or a bladder/kidney infection. She may be in pain which could account for her change in demeaner. Once that has been ruled out you can start to work on self esteem.

jacksdad
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Re: Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

Post by jacksdad » Wed Jun 01, 2011 12:35 pm

vet check for sickness or hidden injury is a good suggestion.

But also give some thought to what might be going on outside your house too. particularly when your not home. has there been any road work, power line work, work done to your house a neighbors house etc.

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Mattie
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Re: Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

Post by Mattie » Wed Jun 01, 2011 1:44 pm

shellfinger wrote:I have a 8 month old Border Collie. She is a wonderful dog other then this peeing all the time. She started a few month ago. She all of a sudden started acting like she is an abused dog (which she never has been). She will not do any of the tricks that she use to love to do. She will not come to you when you call her she hunches in a corner or goes under the table and lays there and pees. If you pet her, talk to her, look at her, command her actually anything makes her pees. She will not even come to you if you have food and you call her. We just removed our carpet because she ruined it. She is house broken she just has this other problem. It is so frustrating. We have tried everything - he stopped talking to her, bending down to pet her, not making eye contact, we tried shaking or throwing a ball before approaching her - nothing is working.
At 8 months old she is going through her second fear period, anything that frightens her during this time can affect her for the rest of her life. Dogs don't get like this for nothing, something has happened, probably when she was in the house on her own so you will never find out what.
If anyone has any suggestions or has had this happen and has any pointers could you please share. I am at my wits end and I'm ready to give her away because she is ruining everything in our house. She is the best dog in the world other then his major problem.

Thanks,
Michelle
This made me very angry, you have had enough, you are ready to give her away like a piece of garbage, how do you thing she is doing, how do you think she is coping, you have a very very frightened dog and you are fed up, tough, she is your dog your responsibility it is up to you to turn her round. What is good you have come and asked for advice so well done for that.

Think of her as being a very nervous child, there are many out there, I knew one that wouldn't speak to anyone until she was 5 years old. She needs to build her confidence which isn't going to be easy but you can do it.

Totally ignore her, the more you try to interact with her the more she gets nervous, let her come out in her time. In the meantime give her a safe place, a comfy bed or crate with a comfy bed in for her to escape to, a cover over it may also help. I am giving my nervous dog a herbal suppliment which is helping him a lot, he is now a lot better and more like a normal dog, if he can every be normal. :lol: The one I am using is Serene-um, you can get it in the USA, do a search for it, it has quite a lot of success with dogs like this so you are able to work with them and help build their confidence.

I would forget about walks at the moment as well, she won't be able to cope with them, she has to go out to toilet but just that and nothing more until she is ready.

Can you give us a run down of her normal day? We may be able to help you ajust this to help her.
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jennageit
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Re: Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

Post by jennageit » Fri Nov 14, 2014 11:30 pm

This post may make me unpopular, but so be it.

It's good that you've come here for advice and tips, and not dumped her at a shelter or had her put down. (The RSPCA near where I used to live had to remove their front fence because of the number of people that would tie their unwanted dogs to the fence late at night to surrender them rather than grow a pair and face the adoption staff).

We've been through this twice so far, once with a Boxer who was 10 months old, the second with my Border Collie who is just now coming out the other side.

The Boxer was a beautiful girl, and then turned into a petrified mess almost overnight. A quick trip to the vets established a chronic ear infection (I'm ashamed I didn't pick it up), and she would have been in constant pain from it, probably with a nasty headeache to go with it. It took over a month to clear up, and then another three months to get her back to her normal happy go lucky doggy again.

With my border collie, she went from a total nutter (happy nutter, but nutter none-the-less) at 9 months old, and is only just coming out of it now at almost 19 months.

In the dog show world, there is a group for Junior dogs, 9 - 18 months of age, and I call them the teenage years for dogs. To me, this is when they are trying to figure out if they are a puppy or adult, and I do tend to liken their behaviour to that of my teenage children. It's a difficult time for them, and probably one of the most important times to do right by your dog.
I'm not sure if it's cruel to my kids or my dogs, but my boy Jock reminds me of my 18yo son when he's in a mood, and my girl Peppa reminds me of my 15yo girl who will either bite your head off or burst into tears at the drop of a hat. Pretty normal behaviour for teenagers, as they too are trying to grow up.

The thought of getting rid of any of them (well, children, maybe lol just joking) whilst they go through this period is abhorrent. They aren't a piece of junk mail that you toss in the rubbish, they are sentient beings with needs, feelings, wants and desires.

First go to the vets and establish whether or not there is a medical issue. If that is ruled out, check out her surroundings, something out there has set this off. If that is still not helpful, question every and all family members for the truth (It'd be nice to think that everyone was honest, but sadly I haven't been given evidence of this yet, so I suspect everyone until I find out otherwise). Someone, somewhere, may have done something to her (inadvertantly) to have brought about this change.

Be there to support your dog through this. She wasn't born this way, she's been made this way, and please let us know how you go.
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emmabeth
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Re: Very Submissive Behavior - ready to give up!

Post by emmabeth » Sun Nov 23, 2014 10:14 pm

Jenna, this user hasn't been back since this thread was posted in 2011 - if you are using the search function to find interesting threads do be aware it will bring up VERY old threads and whilst no one minds if you post on them, it can end up with people wasting their time posting lengthy answers on long dead threads.
West Midlands based 1-2-1 Training & Behaviour Canine Consultant

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