I have a 10 month old Lab that will simply not let people pet him. He is well socialized with both other dogs and humans. However, for about the first 10 minutes he is around people (other than my wife or I), he licks anyone that tries to pet him.
Is there anything that we should be doing about this? Is it something that he will grow out of as he gets older? He doesn't bite and is pretty good about not jumping... he just can't help loving people back when they show him affection. He is great with anything we ask him to do except when he is licking our friends and family.
Here is what we have been/are doing:
We have people ignore him when they first enter our house or when we enter their home wih him until he has settled.
We ask those who greet him to pull there hand away if he begins to lick/mouth them.... and to cross their arms and turn away.
We respond to him with an, "eh-eh" when he mouths other's.... but it gets annoying to repeatedly do that when talking to a friend.
Any new suggestions or thoughts are greatly appreciated because at this point, we are kind of resigning to the idea/hope that this will be something he grows out of...
Lab licking people who want to pet him!!!
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Hi, please bear with me as this is my first post on this site and I may be answering (or posting) in a way or place that I shouldn't be, but....
I just thought I'd at least chime in here since no one has responded to your question(s) and I have a similar issue with my (almost) 12 yr old Sheltie. As long as someone (anyone) is petting her (which everyone LOVES to do since she is so small - doesn't even measure 12" in height - and looks just like a tiny little Lassie), she will continuously lick them! Even when she is doing it to me I will sometimes, finally, get annoyed with it and quit petting her.... I just wish there was a way to get her to control this without hurting her feelings.
I hope someone will come on and give us an answer. I love her so much and LOVE to pet her - I just wish she didn't think she had to constantly "give me kisses" throughout every petting.
Oh, and I guess you can tell by my post that I am NOT a trainer or anything of that nature. Simply a dog lover and owner.
Take care,
BJ
I just thought I'd at least chime in here since no one has responded to your question(s) and I have a similar issue with my (almost) 12 yr old Sheltie. As long as someone (anyone) is petting her (which everyone LOVES to do since she is so small - doesn't even measure 12" in height - and looks just like a tiny little Lassie), she will continuously lick them! Even when she is doing it to me I will sometimes, finally, get annoyed with it and quit petting her.... I just wish there was a way to get her to control this without hurting her feelings.
I hope someone will come on and give us an answer. I love her so much and LOVE to pet her - I just wish she didn't think she had to constantly "give me kisses" throughout every petting.
Oh, and I guess you can tell by my post that I am NOT a trainer or anything of that nature. Simply a dog lover and owner.
Take care,
BJ
Hi, sorry yourp ost seems to have been overlooked.
Ok... first kufankam:
You have the basic idea of how to show your dog that this behaviour is not rewarding, so thats good...
But until you teach him a replacement behaviour that IS rewarding, he will continue trying things that you probably wont like. THe chances of him hitting accidentally upon something you DO like are pretty low.. in any case you do not mention that you reward him for not licking or mouthing..
When you are talking to a friend, ask him to sit, or down, and reward him for doing this. Keep rewarding that down every so often (dont expect him to downstay for an hour!, i mean like every few minutes!) or alternate it with sits... if this is at home then put a dog bed beside you and teach him that when he is on there, he gets his rewards.
Dogs that pester for attention can be very annoying but you cant JUST ignore him to teach him not to seek attention - are you sure he is actually getting the attention he needs.
When you know for a fact he is, so hes doing several hours of walking, playing, training at home and out of the house (combined not individually)... he has chew toys and things to do when expected to be quiet as well... THEN its fair to expect him to be quiet when asked.
Licking is also an appeasement gesture, 'please be my friend' sort of thing... so take a look at your body language and manner around him - why does he need to appease you (if he is doign this)...
Billyjo:
As I mentioned to Kufankam, licking is an appeasing thing and sometimes a stress thing too - IS your little dog willing and welcoming these interaction where she licks. Would she seek people out to lick them, or does this only happen when they try to pet her?
If its them approaching her, trying to pet her etc, I would suspect that she doesnt raelly like it - and its pretty common with small dogs. Huge graet people towering over a dog, forcing physical contact.. very stressful thing.
Try stopping people from doing this and letting HER initiate contact with people in a calm situation, and also try clicker training with her (which is much more rewarding for a dog than being petted).
Ok... first kufankam:
You have the basic idea of how to show your dog that this behaviour is not rewarding, so thats good...
But until you teach him a replacement behaviour that IS rewarding, he will continue trying things that you probably wont like. THe chances of him hitting accidentally upon something you DO like are pretty low.. in any case you do not mention that you reward him for not licking or mouthing..
When you are talking to a friend, ask him to sit, or down, and reward him for doing this. Keep rewarding that down every so often (dont expect him to downstay for an hour!, i mean like every few minutes!) or alternate it with sits... if this is at home then put a dog bed beside you and teach him that when he is on there, he gets his rewards.
Dogs that pester for attention can be very annoying but you cant JUST ignore him to teach him not to seek attention - are you sure he is actually getting the attention he needs.
When you know for a fact he is, so hes doing several hours of walking, playing, training at home and out of the house (combined not individually)... he has chew toys and things to do when expected to be quiet as well... THEN its fair to expect him to be quiet when asked.
Licking is also an appeasement gesture, 'please be my friend' sort of thing... so take a look at your body language and manner around him - why does he need to appease you (if he is doign this)...
Billyjo:
As I mentioned to Kufankam, licking is an appeasing thing and sometimes a stress thing too - IS your little dog willing and welcoming these interaction where she licks. Would she seek people out to lick them, or does this only happen when they try to pet her?
If its them approaching her, trying to pet her etc, I would suspect that she doesnt raelly like it - and its pretty common with small dogs. Huge graet people towering over a dog, forcing physical contact.. very stressful thing.
Try stopping people from doing this and letting HER initiate contact with people in a calm situation, and also try clicker training with her (which is much more rewarding for a dog than being petted).
I look after a lovely lab cross who is licky mad! He would lick every available bit of skin if its near him and watch out faces of any child his height!
Some people love all the kisses but others dont.
When hes being licky hes usually being excitable too. I dont touch him or pay any attention at all until he is sitting down (and not leaning on me you loveable oaf you - sit up straight!).
He craves attention and learned quickly what he had to do to get it. He still has the urge to lick but his tongue just laps at the air and he knows not to make contact!
It sounds as though you are doing the right things - wait for her to calm down and then ask her to sit for a fuss. If she goes to lick you pull away but try again a few moments later. Again if she goes to lick pull away quickly. If she is craving the attention she should figure it out before long.
Some people love all the kisses but others dont.
When hes being licky hes usually being excitable too. I dont touch him or pay any attention at all until he is sitting down (and not leaning on me you loveable oaf you - sit up straight!).
He craves attention and learned quickly what he had to do to get it. He still has the urge to lick but his tongue just laps at the air and he knows not to make contact!
It sounds as though you are doing the right things - wait for her to calm down and then ask her to sit for a fuss. If she goes to lick you pull away but try again a few moments later. Again if she goes to lick pull away quickly. If she is craving the attention she should figure it out before long.
It's strange the way we humans think, isn't it - the dog must welcome anyone and everyone petting him or her - but oh no, the dog is not allowed to lick them when they do.
If I tell people not to pet my dog because she doesn't like strangers touching her - they get really offended!
If I tell people not to pet my dog because she doesn't like strangers touching her - they get really offended!
A dog is never bad or naughty - it is simply being a dog
SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
thank you all for your responses... i will continue to try and work with him to have better greeting manners...
nettie...
it is not that i refuse to allow my dog to be excited to see others, or that i refuse to allow others to greet him... i just want him to be able to settle down enough to where it is not overwhelming to him or the human that is greeting him... that is all. i never tell people they cannot pet my dog... i love the fact that my lab is excitable and that he loves to see people... all i am trying to do is teach him that more people will want to show him affection, if he would not give them a bath every time they touch him. does that make sense?
anyway. i really appreciate everyone's input. just to know that there are others out there who love dogs as much as i do is refreshing. i love this website!!!
nettie...
it is not that i refuse to allow my dog to be excited to see others, or that i refuse to allow others to greet him... i just want him to be able to settle down enough to where it is not overwhelming to him or the human that is greeting him... that is all. i never tell people they cannot pet my dog... i love the fact that my lab is excitable and that he loves to see people... all i am trying to do is teach him that more people will want to show him affection, if he would not give them a bath every time they touch him. does that make sense?
anyway. i really appreciate everyone's input. just to know that there are others out there who love dogs as much as i do is refreshing. i love this website!!!
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But sometimes you should tell people they cannot pet your dog!--when it's going to over-excite or over-stress him.it is not that i refuse to allow my dog to be excited to see others, or that i refuse to allow others to greet him... i just want him to be able to settle down enough to where it is not overwhelming to him or the human that is greeting him... that is all. i never tell people they cannot pet my dog... i love the fact that my lab is excitable and that he loves to see people... all i am trying to do is teach him that more people will want to show him affection, if he would not give them a bath every time they touch him. does that make sense?
Nettle was pointing out the imbalance in the relationship between people and dogs--we expect dogs to be delighted to be touched and petted by everyone we choose to introduce to them, but we also expect the dog to not "touch back" in a way that's natural for dogs. And we know that not every person likes dogs, but we expect every dog to like every person.
The licking may be appeasement behavior--these people worry him and he's trying to make sure they know he's harmless and not challenging them. If that's the case, he needs you to tell them, "Don't pet my dog." He needs you to protect him.
Or he may be delighted and excited with all the attention--and not know an acceptable way to invite and accept it. You need to teach him a behavior he can do that gets rewarded by people petting and praising him.
With Addy when I first got her, it was a combination of both: she really wanted attention from people, but it also scared the pants off her. Along with a lot of desensitization and being willing to be very aggressive when necessary about making people ignore the dog so that she could take her own time to check them out and decide to come forward or not, what really helped her was teaching her two commands that gave her something to do to get and accept attention: Sit, and Dance. "Dance" lets my little dog get up on her hind legs to get a better look, without putting her front feet on anyone. So, okay, Dance is not such a great choice for a Lab. But you might teach Bow or something similar.
Let go of the idea that it's rude to tell people not to pet your dog. Figure out whether your dog is happy-excited to see people, or stressed and nervous. Then work on teaching behaviors that give you and him more control of the interaction, and gives him an appropriate way to behave, to substitute for his current inappropriately excesssive lickig.
Lis
that totally makes sense... i just completely misunderstood. the e-communication world got me that time... nettie, i did not take your comments personally... i just wanted to make sure i was communicating better. i hope it didnt come accross that i was being defensive (not my intent at all)...
so i think i have a better understanding now... it is more okay than i thought that he licks people? right? so if people would like to pet him, i will just let them know, "we humans shake hands, he licks".
i just want him to be the best dog ever!!!! no pressure right (wink, wink)? thank you to everyone for your responses and i again apologize for my misunderstanding.
so i think i have a better understanding now... it is more okay than i thought that he licks people? right? so if people would like to pet him, i will just let them know, "we humans shake hands, he licks".
i just want him to be the best dog ever!!!! no pressure right (wink, wink)? thank you to everyone for your responses and i again apologize for my misunderstanding.