What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

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JudyN
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by JudyN » Sun Jun 24, 2018 12:21 pm

Would the house then be yours and you'd have to pay the whole mortgage, LoQ? Is that doable? The last thing you need is having to sort out all the practicalities on top of everything else :(

We went down to Poole Park & the bit of coast right next to it this morning.

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Next week, I'm going to have to aim for early walks in the woods, and in the afternoon either no walks or back to the woods, depending on what J says.
Jasper, lurcher, born December 2009

ZaraD
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by ZaraD » Sun Jun 24, 2018 12:28 pm

Agree with Judy is it doable? , This is why I asked as if it was brought out right then you would be entitled to half, since it's on a mortgage , you will need to decide what you want to do as if you start missing payments then they will kick you out ( happend to my sister and she missed one payment and they took the property off her as it is there's and sold it to get there money back)

As they have every right to take control of the house to clear the debt. It only that but if you sell the house you have to pay the mortgage off first before buying anywhere else.

You really need to decide what you want to do that's right for you and Merlin now before the mortgage lender gets involved.

Lotsaquestions
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by Lotsaquestions » Sun Jun 24, 2018 1:12 pm

Paying the mortgage each month is cheaper than renting, especially with a dog in tow. It is also more secure. I can't afford it as of right now since I still don't have an income, but I couldn't afford to rent right now either.

ZaraD
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by ZaraD » Sun Jun 24, 2018 1:15 pm

Lotsaquestions wrote:
Sun Jun 24, 2018 1:12 pm
Paying the mortgage each month is cheaper than renting, especially with a dog in tow. It is also more secure. I can't afford it as of right now since I still don't have an income, but I couldn't afford to rent right now either.
When you get a job you might be able to afford it then? , I'm just worried that you might not find a job in time as lenders suck as banks don't wait long after a missed payment, I'm just saying incase you ex moves out and leaves you with it and you can't afford it

JudyN
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by JudyN » Sun Jun 24, 2018 1:31 pm

I think the important thing is to have a back-up plan to fall back on before you dig yourself into a deep financial pit. Hopefully your ex will realise that he can't choose to support you for however long and then expect you to have a regular income straight away. And don't be afraid to talk to your bank, utilities companies, mortgager and so on - they're all used to dealing with people in financial difficulty and want to help them.

If DS2 split up with his partner and was in a fix, I'd have him back here in a heartbeat, so I'm sure your parents will be there for you too.

Of course, you know your situation better than we do, so just ignore us if any of this is advice you really don't need.
Jasper, lurcher, born December 2009

Lotsaquestions
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by Lotsaquestions » Sun Jun 24, 2018 1:42 pm

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ZaraD
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by ZaraD » Sun Jun 24, 2018 1:55 pm

Lotsaquestions wrote:
Sun Jun 24, 2018 1:42 pm
My parents is my fall back plan, but their house isn't really equipped to have me back so trying everything to avoid it. They are talking about selling their diamonds as well just incase I'm in a real desperate situation, but I would rather they didn't have to do that.

My ex can't just stop paying the mortgage as his credit rating will be in trouble. I'm not sure he can sign it over to me without my signiture either, at least I hope not! Right now he's still paying for everything, and I'm trying not to do anything to rock the boat until I'm financially independent. He's been quite nasty throughout this whole thing, and I'm just smiling and nodding and keeping the house clean. :roll:

Problem is I can't even sign on to jobseekers as he'll be classed as my partner, so household income will be taken into account. I literally have no other option but to hope he'll support me for a little longer. It's horrible. :(

I have applied for going on 15 jobs so far though, got twenty more to apply for next week. Most of those will cover the mortgage / bills, and my brother (who is autistic and currently lives with my parents) has shown a real interest in moving into the spare room once the ex has gone. He'll be able to help out a little financially too, and it'll mean Merlin isn't left on his own too long.
I hope you get a job soon so you can get out this situation and start to look to the future, if you did want any advice citizens advice bureau are great and helped my sister a lot?

Lotsaquestions
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by Lotsaquestions » Sun Jun 24, 2018 2:05 pm

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JudyN
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by JudyN » Sun Jun 24, 2018 2:32 pm

Good luck with the job applications. You sound as if you're managing to stay very strong in what must be a horrible situation. Don't let the chocolate stores run low!
Jasper, lurcher, born December 2009

Lotsaquestions
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by Lotsaquestions » Sun Jun 24, 2018 2:40 pm

I think its more the case I have no option but to try and be strong. I'll worry about letting myself get upset once I'm financially secure. :lol:

Got plenty of choccy biscuits to keep my coffees company. :)

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Nettle
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by Nettle » Mon Jun 25, 2018 4:14 am

We're all here for you. Quite a few of us will have been in a similar situation and know how hard it is, but one day you'll be looking back at it knowing you got through and triumphed.
A dog is never bad or naughty - it is simply being a dog

SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS

JudyN
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by JudyN » Mon Jun 25, 2018 1:20 pm

Rather than our usual hot-weather routine of a 'where you want to go' walk in the morning and in the car to the woods in the afternoon, I took J to the woods for a long walk this morning as I wasn't sure he'd want to go out at all in the afternoon. I met a friend who was walking her neice's Munsterlander (small, I think - that's two I've seen in the last month or so!). He was young and handsome and J had a very brief grrr when we were close to the gate (trigger point) but was fine after that.

Later we met a friend with her young, bouncy, unneutered 2-year-old German wire-haired pointer. J has known him since he was a puppy though and tends to tell him briefly that he's the boss (which can be little more than a dirty look) and then they're fine. This morning, they played chase! I say 'play', this might be J demonstrating that he was bigger and faster, but then J did a couple of further laps on his own! He's not done that since - well, I can't remember when. He's known this friend from when he was around 4 months old and I wonder if seeing her put him in a puppy frame of mind.

He wasn't in the least bit interested in going for a walk this afternoon which is just as well as I'd opened just about every window in the house and it would have been a pain to shut them again and then open them up when we got back.
Jasper, lurcher, born December 2009

ZaraD
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by ZaraD » Mon Jun 25, 2018 2:25 pm

JudyN wrote:
Mon Jun 25, 2018 1:20 pm
Rather than our usual hot-weather routine of a 'where you want to go' walk in the morning and in the car to the woods in the afternoon, I took J to the woods for a long walk this morning as I wasn't sure he'd want to go out at all in the afternoon. I met a friend who was walking her neice's Munsterlander (small, I think - that's two I've seen in the last month or so!). He was young and handsome and J had a very brief grrr when we were close to the gate (trigger point) but was fine after that.

Later we met a friend with her young, bouncy, unneutered 2-year-old German wire-haired pointer. J has known him since he was a puppy though and tends to tell him briefly that he's the boss (which can be little more than a dirty look) and then they're fine. This morning, they played chase! I say 'play', this might be J demonstrating that he was bigger and faster, but then J did a couple of further laps on his own! He's not done that since - well, I can't remember when. He's known this friend from when he was around 4 months old and I wonder if seeing her put him in a puppy frame of mind.

He wasn't in the least bit interested in going for a walk this afternoon which is just as well as I'd opened just about every window in the house and it would have been a pain to shut them again and then open them up when we got back.

It's been hell here too Judy , Sampson can't go for walks anyway as he's recovering but even Lara did not want to go at all as it was way to hot it's been 30°c down here it's now 25°c even the air conditioning and all windows did not help, I been exercising her mind instead as she wants to do is sit in her paddle pool. I hope it doesn't last too long I don't know how much more any of us can take, some reports suggest that by the end of the week it could be as high as 35°c :shock

JudyN
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by JudyN » Mon Jun 25, 2018 2:35 pm

Urgh... It's only 25c here, relatively cool! Being close to the coast tends to moderate temperatures here.
Jasper, lurcher, born December 2009

Erica
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Re: What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

Post by Erica » Mon Jun 25, 2018 2:38 pm

We have a low of 23C and a high of 35C (72F and 95F respectively) recently, plus humidity like walking through a swamp. It's no fun.
Delta, standard poodle, born 6/30/14

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