What are you and your dogs up to today? Part 2

[JudyN]

I had to laugh - my raw food supplier has posted a collection of photos on Facebook: 'A collection of images that we feel capture real life around your pets & depict the lifestyle of owning a fit & healthy dog.' One photo is of me and Jasper in an outside cafe, looking into each other's eyes - he's wearing his coat, I'm wearing about 20 layers, gloves & woolly hat, clutching a cup of coffee trying to gain some warmth from it Yup, that's what having a fit and healthy dog entails

[Nettle]

How I empathise!

[Shalista]

Bax had a miserable night last night and I pulled another furmom fail.

Bax HATES the wind. I learned this the last time he started spontaneously barking. He does his startled bark when its windy. Usually when something scares him (like an object falling off a shelf) he does this weird grump that's halfway between a cough and a bark. Usually he'll only do it until he gets used to the disruption and comes up for a tentative sniff but for wind there's no sniffing. He just cough/barks at it a bunch then goes into full throated barks, and then falls back to cough barking. he paces with his ears all the way up and he neck rigid and he'll just stare at the door leading out of my room like he expects an ax murderer to come through.

So I was busy working on my computer and he starts up with his cough barks as he grumps and grumbles about the wind and because I am the epitome of empathy and compassion I'm saying in my head, "Great. My dog is so obnoxious. Why can't I have a normal dog?"

He grumps and grumbled for maybe twenty minuets as my patience winds down until finally he lunges into full throated barks. Having enough I leap up shoo him out the door and slam it shut for him to bark out in the kitchen. After all, that's how I've handled his barking in the past.

But as I settle into my chair at the computer again I can't help thinking "wow, I'm an asshole." He's just scared. I can't imagine how scary the wind must sound if you have hearing as good as Bax's. Not to mention he spent his entire puppyhood outside with just a couple of tiny boxes to fit ALL THOSE dogs inside. I can't imagine what it was like for him to be in a storm with no shelter at all.

So I got up and I opened the door and I sat on the floor and I waited. He was very hesitant approaching but eventually he snaked his neck out for a sniff and I offered my hand and I told him what a brave puppy he was and that there was nothing to be afraid of. I started petting him and he turned his body so he could get pets AND face the scary noise and I just pet him and told him he was wonderful and he didn't have to be afraid anymore. He eventually stopped grumbling, then sat, then offered an arm pit, before finally laying down. Even while lying down though he was rigid with his ears up and his neck straight, staring.

With him a little more calmed down I got up, turned off my computer, and we went to bed early. I think he was still nervous though because just like how he comforted me when I was paranoid at night by climbing up to curl up next to me, last night he curled up right next to me and I pet him until he finally fell asleep. He woke up twice with a start at a particularly big whoosh of wind but thankfully I woke up to and I was able to talk to him and pet him until he finally fell back asleep.

So, that's my furmom fail for the day. I didn't have enough empathy to see that Bax was just scared and there was an easy fix that would make us BOTH happy if i just took the time to help him and let him know the world isn't such a scary place. But I think I recovered it gracefully. Hopefully.

[Nettle]

Well done - mistakes are there to be learned from, and you have learned a lot this day.

[JudyN]

You turned the furmom fail into a furmom success, Shalista. And next time, you'll know what he needs

[Shalista]

Bax has taught me so much about patience and empathy and putting yourself in someone else's shoes (or paws). I'll forever be grateful to him.

[Erica]

Bax has taught me so much about patience and empathy and putting yourself in someone else's shoes (or paws). I'll forever be grateful to him.

It's the difficult dogs we learn the most from!

I don't know if anyone's read Patricia McConnell's newest book "The Education of Will," but it's very personal -- warning that it includes discussion of sexual assault -- and talks about how this extremely fearful, reactive puppy helped her learn a lot about dogs (even after decades of training!) and about herself. (It's less new knowledge about dogs if you've read her other books, but the average person would pick up a few good thoughts about dogs from it.)

[JudyN]

I'm the same - Jasper can throw a right royal tantrum, leaping up at me (which means he's taller than me) and swearing roundly (like when we got cornered in a garden centre by a cat, or I explain to him that he's not coming through the gate with his new bunny), and I can stay completely calm & don't even feel annoyed with him. I know that he would calm down if he could, and if I stay calm it's going to be much easier for him to do the same.

I never managed this level of Zen with my children!

[Shalista]

Yeah it's like, he's doing the best he can with the tools he has

[MPbandmom]

Meet and greet scheduled with the pet carers next week. If that goes well, there will be a test visit the following week. Although it is looking like our weekend get away is going to turn into a day trip and pets will only need a single visit for potty break while we are gone.

I am such a cheapskate. I booked the motel for 2 nights deciding on the more pricey one where the event will be in case OH needs to get into a more horizontal position for the comfort of his back. Then I got to thinking about motel + pet care + rental car and questioned whether hearing this speaker was really worth that kind of expense.

Looking back at the event and I noticed the start time had been changed to a late enough hour to allow for a reasonable get up and drive time. So no need to pay for motel, reduced number of pet care visits needed, and only the rental car to now debate and decide upon. (I have decided I no longer trust any of our vehicles for long distance trips. Too many worrying but intermittent issues which never seem to occur when the vehicle is taken to the repair shop.)

If this all works out, we may be able to take some other day trips that OH would enjoy. I would rather go places that the dogs could go too, but with OH having trouble with his back again, there aren't many activities that meet the needs of both dogs and OH at the same time.

[Shalista]

finally got to meet and hang out with a greyhound properly today...and it came out to a big fat meh. he just didn't care. this dog was totally apathetic about everything.
his treats? eh.
people? who cares?
his owner? eh.

and i rmemebered that the other dogs at the rescues birthday party were similar. they just don't seem to be an exuberantly people greeting breed, which i guess comes with the general low energy and chill vibe but still. Seeing Bax really come out of his shell and become mind blowingly happy to see me has really warmed my heart. I'm not sure greyhounds are the perfect breed for me anymore =( I want something with a LITTLE pep.


........ i may be doomed to a life time of terriers

[JudyN]

Oh, I have to stick up for the sighthounds!

They aren't meh, they're just relatively undemonstrative, and they're not going to just throw themselves at anyone regardless of who they are. They are polite, and will respect your personal space just as they expect you to respect yours. When they like/love/trust you they will show it, but not in a way that will have you flat on your back and needing to mop saliva off your face. If absolutely besotted, they may rest their head on your lap, sigh deeply, and let all the tension out of their body. It's real love, not the sort of indiscriminate love that labradors, for example, seem to feel for everyone. Stare into their eyes and you will see into their souls - there's a lot more going on in there than in all these frantic Duracell bunny blue-bummed fly dogs.

These are dogs that will worm their way into your heart rather than try to lick your brains out via your ears.

Of course, I speak partly in jest - different types of dogs with different energy levels suit different people. And the greyhound you met today may have been genuinely apathetic. But think of them like the cool handsome quiet deep-thinking guy at the party where everyone else is screeching and throwing vodka jelly around

And of course, although Jasper is only 5/8 greyhound (and has never been meh about food),I am 100% biased!

[Shalista]

Yeah i guess what i was looking for was some pep, some sass. maybe i really do need the "wipe the slober off your face" kind of dog. Bax had his issues so i never would have accused him being demonstrative of showing his affections buuuuutt compared to that greyhound he really does O.o maybe i need that?

(Sorry to inadvertently throw shade at sighthounds. Burt truly was a lovely dog, just maybe not quite the cup of tea i had in mind)

[Erica]

Maybe check out silken windhounds? I think the people who've had various sighthounds say the silkens are more get-up-and-go and more demonstrative with their affection. I'd also recommend trying to befriend a sighthound before making a decision...we just had a gorgeous whippet in my class, who week one wanted nothing to do with me. Week five, she was ready to jump into my arms if I so much as looked at her. But it took some convincing before she decided she liked me! Whippets and Silkens are in my "maybe one day" list, to be honest.

I don't think any of the greyhounds I've met would ever be described as "sassy," though.

[Shalista]

HOLY CRAP thats a gorgeous dog!I'd never heard of silkens before. these look amazing! a little more outgoing, a little smaller. thanks so much, i clearly have some more research to do <3