New Baby, "Bad Dog", And Behavior Modification

As a new mother, and a life-long dog guardian I am finally experiencing and understanding the true demands of being a multi-species mother! As a trainer, I have helped many clients prepare for their coming baby, but in going through this myself, I have adjusted my expectations, and what I will be teaching from now on.

Every good behavior modification plan includes training and management. Training will be for the times you are working with your dog to increase or decrease a specific behavior. Management is the part of the plan intended to lessen the unwanted behavior, by altering the environment. Management is also used to keep everyone safe during training; an example of this is using a muzzle.

I want to pause here to explain two terms, as I would define them:

Crate:

The word crate, when used in this blog, refers to any safe confinement area that is at least large enough for your dog to stand up, lay down on his side, and turn around. The space can also be as large as a designated room, but this must be a consistent space, where the baby does spend any time, that can safely confine the dog. The crate should be a positive and happy place, not a punishment.

Muzzle:

A muzzle is a very fun, and tasty tool when introduced correctly. The way I use it, a muzzle most closely resembles a feed bag! I like to fill a muzzle with peanut butter or cream cheese, treats, and snacks, and then freeze it to create a popsicle-type treat that eventually gets strapped right to your dog’s face. What could be better?

Management First

If you have a dog who displays aggression, anxiety, or fear and you've been working on this with a trainer, first of all, good for you! Second, when you find out you’re expecting, you should talk to your trainer about changing your training plan. This might seem obvious; of course, you now have to focus your training on preparing your dog for your baby. But the approach I’m suggesting is a little different than what I have heard, and even suggested in the past.

I would drop most of the training portions that don’t involve management. Invest your time in training your dog to tolerate, and even enjoy the management, rather than worrying about your behavior modification plan. Your time will be better spent training your dog to wear a muzzle or spend some quiet time in his crate, than trying to cure a behavior problem before your baby arrives. If your dog can safely and comfortably wear a muzzle, and calmly tolerate a crate, there is little he can’t do! An even better way to look at it is that there is little he CAN do, meaning he can’t bite, jump, snap, or likely succeed in misbehaving, which is the whole point!

Bringing Home Baby

Beyond teaching your dog to accept and tolerate the most common management tools, you will also want to come up with a game plan for him once your baby arrives. You won’t have the same time for him, no matter how much you want to! Trust me, I’m a trainer, and fully consider my dog another child, but with a newborn, she just can’t get the same attention she did before. Don’t beat yourself up over this; instead, have a plan! Have a designated time every day that you can be one-on-one with your dog, even if just for 15 minutes. If you simply can’t ever be alone with the dog because you are parenting on your own, don’t worry, just think of his next favorite thing, and do that! Does your dog love doggy daycare, or have a favorite family member who visits? Maybe you could send him to daycare a little more often when the baby first comes, or arrange for your family to come to spend quality time with him while you adjust.

My dog loves my mother, almost as much as me, so planning some extra visits with her really helped my dog to not feel left out, plus it gave grandma extra visits with her new grandchild. Get creative, if your dog has a dog friend in your neighborhood, maybe inquire about a possible play date. If your dog loves a walk through the park, but you don’t have time, consider a dog walker to take him on these longer jaunts. Think about this before your baby comes and decide if you can budget time or money for your dog, and then decide how best to use the resource you can.

Keeping Everyone Safe And Happy

A dog who happily trots into his crate, or shoves his face into a muzzle without hesitation, will mean a lot less stress for new parents! This will provide you with a guilt-free way to keep your baby, family, and guests safe. Utilizing the time you have to train for management, while you are pregnant, will ease a lot of pressure you are feeling once your newborn is home.

If you haven’t worked with a trainer, or if your dog is fairly well behaved, but doesn’t tolerate these management tools, I strongly encourage you to seek a certified trainer to help you. If you are in the New York City area, please feel free to reach out to us for help.