Finding my way around

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Manerling
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Nov 29, 2012 2:16 am

Finding my way around

Post by Manerling »

Hello Everyone:

My screen name is Manerling. Many years ago, I read an English novel about a family that lived on an estate called Manerling. On one of my visits to the UK, I had the good fortune to visit the real Manerling and fell in love with the place. It’s a name that I’ve never forgotten
I’m originally from VA, USA a retired child psychologist. I live with my son in FL, our two cats, Link and Malka and our Rat Terrier, Max. The relationship between Max and I is a miracle in itself. Let me just give you the highlights.

Three years ago I was diagnosed with an incurable illness that will eventually take my life, unless I walk under a bus first . . . given my ability to find myself I the wrong place at the wrong time, that’s not as remote a possibility as many people may think. But I digress. . . I had to retire from work that I loved. I had served children with developmental disabilities for more than 35 years. I educated parents, teachers, pediatricians and anyone who dealt with disabled youngsters. Needless to say, I loved what I did. Suddenly, there I was, sick and unable to return to the children and their families whom I had grown to love.

As time passed, I became depressed. I was sick of being sick, but more than anything else, I was lonely. My daughter is married and lives in another state. My son, with whom I live, is single, but has a career and a life to live.

One day, my son decided that “he needed a dog in his life.” That sounded very queer to me, because this man hardly has time to shave, much less for a dog. Off we went to the local animal shelter and looked around. Throughout our tour he kept asking, “Dad, which one do you suggest?”
After about an hour I pointed to a Rat Terrier. We asked all the right questions, spent time with him and found out that his name is Max. We also found out that his family had just surrendered him because they were unable to educate Max. He was two-years old and house trained, but that was it, according to the adoption counselor who helped us.

There was something about Max that attracted me to him. When asked again, “Dad, what do you think?” I immediately said that I thought this dog had potential. I have no idea why I ever said such a thing. In my own way, I guess I was looking at him through the eyes of a psychologist who had dealt all of his life with children whom people said could not be educated and I proved them wrong.

To make this rather long story shorter, if that’s humanly possible at this point, we took Max home. True enough, he was a disaster. This little Rat Terrier was like the proverbial bull in the china shop. To make matters interesting, my son put time into Max, but continuously asked me to help him by walking Max or to look at this or that behavior and give him some ideas.
When my daughter came to visit, she started to laugh and to tease me. “You’re a psychologist and you’ve fallen victim to your own methods. My brother got this dog more for your benefit than his.” She was right.

I’m still home, but I’m no longer lonely. Not only that, but within three months Max learned to walk on a loose leash, sit, down, stay, come, go home when outside, go to his place when company comes over, get on and off furniture on command, and do other things like back up, freeze and has stopped reacting to people as we pass them on our walks.

I don’t walk much, because of my health. My son takes care of the daily jog with Max, while he and I take “old man walks”. These are five minute walks until I tire. We take several a day on a good day. On a not so good day, we play and train inside. The entire time, I watched every Victoria Stilwell video that I could find on the Internet and used everything that she had to teach me. That and my experience teaching parents and teachers how to connect with youngsters who have limitations, has worked for Max and me. He’s no longer the bull in the china shop and I’m no longer as depressed about being unable to work as I was. Victoria, my son and Max have saved my sanity and prolonged my life.

We’re still working on some details here and there, but making some progress. I don’t know anything about Max’s formative years. My suspicion is that he was not properly socialized as a puppy. He lunged at people, which he no longer does, but he still goes bananas when he sees another dog. We’re working on this behavior now, using positive reinforcement. By the way, if you want a good way to get rid of all that leftover turkey from Thanksgiving or Christmas, the white meat makes great treats. Just ask Max.

Here I am, looking to see what I can learn and what I can share. Thanks for allowing me to share my story.

Maner :)
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Nettle
Posts: 10753
Joined: Sun Apr 13, 2008 1:40 pm

Re: Finding my way around

Post by Nettle »

Welcome to the Board :D and thank you for such an informative first post - we feel we know you and Max already.
A dog is never bad or naughty - it is simply being a dog

SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
Sweetie's Human
Posts: 333
Joined: Sun Apr 15, 2012 5:19 am

Re: Finding my way around

Post by Sweetie's Human »

What a great post. I love stories about rescued dogs who end up 'rescuing' their humans in return! Sounds like you are both lucky to have found each other.
Ari_RR
Posts: 2037
Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 10:07 am
Location: USA
Contact:

Re: Finding my way around

Post by Ari_RR »

Great story. My hat is off to your son. Welcome.
ClareMarsh
Posts: 2008
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2011 5:11 am
Location: London, UK

Re: Finding my way around

Post by ClareMarsh »

Ari_RR wrote:My hat is off to your son.
I suspect he's a chip off the old block Ari :wink:

Welcome to the boards :D
Proud owner of Ted and baby Ella
My blog about Ted http://tinkerwolf.com/
Ted's Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/Tinkerwolf
Ted's You Tube Channel http://www.youtube.com/user/TheTedVids
gwd
Posts: 1958
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2012 11:33 pm

Re: Finding my way around

Post by gwd »

ClareMarsh wrote:
Ari_RR wrote:My hat is off to your son.
I suspect he's a chip off the old block Ari :wink:
exactly, sounds like dad trained the son well too!

welcome to you and max.
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OnceInAWeil
Posts: 431
Joined: Sat Oct 20, 2012 4:20 pm
Location: AZ, USA

Re: Finding my way around

Post by OnceInAWeil »

Welcome, Manerling and Max. :D Your story is so touching.
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